Haze
by outcastfromgallifrey
Summary: The Doctor(tentoo) finds himself in a hospital ward with no memory of who he is or his past. He can only remember one person…Rose. TentooxRose AU
1. Haze

It wasn't a very large room, just the size of a bedroom. In fact it was a bedroom, complete with a bed shoved in a corner, table and lamp, and a bathroom connected to the room. The walls were a cream white and bare. A small window rested in the wall that the bed was pressed against. White panes were across it, making them seem like prison bars. The whole place seemed like a prison to him. Either that, or a very strict hospital.

From where he sat on the floor leaning against a wall, he could just see though the window and out into the world beyond. A darkened sky stared back at him. Thick clouds littered the heavens promising rain. No zeppelins were in the sky. But then again, why would they? Only fools would fly in this weather.

A knock came from the door. Lazily turning his head, he stared blankly as a woman walked in. She had honey-brown skin with a shade darker hair. She was wearing a deep blue dress that stopped above her knee complete with slightly see-through black tights. A smile was across her mouth as she made her way across the room to him.

"Good evening, John," she said, bending down to rest a hand on his shoulder. "How are you doing today? Are you well?"

He blinked at her slowly and said nothing. Nothing needed to be said. He wasn't feeling well, but he wasn't feeling bad either. He wasn't feeling anything. Nothing. It was emptiness, like he'd forgotten something.

The woman frowned at him, "Come now. Enough with the moping," she said. "You need to get some exercise. Come on. Up you go!"

The woman looped an arm around his and heaved him up from the floor. He didn't protest, but shook her off when he was standing.

"Now, there's no need for that," she told him. "I know you don't like being touched, but that gives you no right to be rude."

He ignored her, staring blankly at the floor. He wasn't wearing any shoes and his white sweat pants pooled at his heels. He wondered where they'd taken his shoes. They were the burgundy ones, not the white trainers.

"Come on, you," the woman said. "Let's go talk to your friends!"

He raised his head as she waved a hand at him, beckoning him to follow. Not like he had any choice in the matter. She'd make sure he'd follow her.

Reluctantly he walked after her, dragging his feet against the floor. She led him out of the room and into a corridor. Painted white, of course, it seemed to be the favorite color of this place.

He moved his gaze around to look at the doors that lined the halls. Each had a nameplate on it and a number beside it. Definitely giving off the 'prison' vibe.

Soon he and the woman reached a large room with various people sitting about. This room was different from the hall and what he assumed was his room. Different colored walls met his eyes this time, with large windows. Flat-screened televisions hung from the ceiling playing various channels. Tables were strewn about the room and many people sat at them, engaged in different activities. Everyone seemed to be wearing the same type of clothing; sweat pants, a plain t-shirt and in some cases, a hooded sweatshirt. Not all in the same color, but mostly dull washed-out hues.

He registered that while he had been taking in the room, the woman had been speaking beside him. Now she was looking at him with a happy smile. He didn't hear a word she said but nodded. Nodding always worked to get one out of a conversation.

"Well, good," the woman grinned again. "Now make yourself at home! Go and meet the neighbors!"

She gave him a little push making him grunt and move forward.

"Have fun!" She waved as she started back into the hall. "And just call me if you need anything."

That wouldn't do much good, figuring that he'd never got her name. She flashed him another smile before disappearing down the hall. He watched her go briefly before turning back to the room. Sighing, he made his way across the room to go sit on an L-shaped couch. Another man was sitting by one of the arms and his eyes followed him as he sat in the corner of the sofa.

"He's new, Thomas," the man whispered to himself. "Thomas hasn't seen him before."

The man, "Thomas" watched him through haunted eyes. He ignored him and brought his feet up on the cushion, resting his arms on his knees. More murmuring came from Thomas and he glared at with irritation.

"Thomas thinks the man looks sad," Thomas muttered. "Thomas wonders why. But Thomas wonders about a lot of things. What's that pretty thing the man has around his neck, Thomas? It's shiny."

Pretty thing? Glancing down at his chest he noticed that he was wearing a small chain with a silver ring handing like pendant from it. Taking the band in his fingers, he traced the smooth edge. There wasn't anything fancy about the ring, and he didn't even know why he had it.

"Thomas thinks he had a ring like that once," the man mumbled. "Maybe the man has Thomas's ring. Thomas should take it back."

He'd had enough of this "Thomas" person. Tucking the chain and ring in his sweatshirt he turned away from the coot and curled up against the couch. Thomas kept on muttering to himself but he toned him out. He let his gaze move slowly around the room glancing at the various people. He'd pretty much figured out where he was beforehand, and now Thomas had just proven it. He was in a mental hospital, locked away for whatever reason. Probably had to do with not remembering. He couldn't recall what he'd done yesterday, or any other day in the past. He didn't even know his name. The woman had called him John, but he didn't think that was his real name.

"Thomas wants to see the ring," Thomas's voice was very close to him making him jump slightly. Whipping his head over his shoulder, he saw that Thomas was sitting next to him on his knees. He held out hand as if expecting him to give him the little trinket.

"Leave off," he spoke finally for the first time. His voice sounded hard and unfamiliar to him. Thomas scowled at him and leaned over him.

"Thomas just wants to see it," the man reached out an arm trying to reach into his hoodie to grab the ring. He swatted his arm away and sat up glaring sternly at Thomas.

"Oi! You heard the man," a female voice called out. "Now sod off, Gollum!"

Thomas turned to look at the newcomer, and scowling, backed off the couch and stalked away. He watched the man leave and then turned to look to his rescuer. A gasped escaped from him. Standing before him was a woman looking to be in her late twenties wearing the same style clothing as him. She had beautiful blonde hair that curled in at her shoulders with soft hazel eyes. Her full lips were parted slightly giving him a small smile.

He had seen her before. Somehow he knew that face, those eyes, that smile she gave just for him. He knew her and yet he couldn't remember where.

"You alright, mate?" She said stepped closer and sat across from where he was half sitting, half lying on the couch. "You look a little spooked."

He opened and closed his mouth trying to form words. He couldn't think of what to say. Pushing himself up slightly, he shaking pointed to her and then to him and mumbled, "I, I knowyou."

"Do you?" she said softly and sadness clouded her eyes. "Then, do you know my name?"

"I, I," he stuttered and racked his brain for her name. His memories seemed foggy as if it was forbidden for him to remember. He could remember snippets of her voice, her laugh, and could recall hazy images of her. He _knew _her. And he knew her name.

Before he could speak a loud buzz sounded overhead and a voice came through the intercom, "Social time is over now. Would everyone please return to their rooms? We'll have a nice dinner waiting for you all! The staff is always here to assist you, so don't feel afraid to ask for something! Enjoy your meals!"

The patients began to abandon their previous activities and all went shuffling back to their rooms. A few had nurses directing them which way to go, smiling to the patients as they did.

"We better go," the woman said beside him and she lifted herself from the couch. Panic stuck him as she left and he scrambled to stand. She was walking away, just like she did before.

"Rose!" he called out. She stopped. Grinning happily, he ran over to where she was standing and she turned slowly to look at him.

"Rose, Rose, Rose, Rose," he repeated. "That's your name! I know you! I _know _you. You're Rose, Rose T..."

She looked hopefully up at him when he broke off. But he shook his head; he couldn't remember her last name. And it pained him to realize that.

"Tyler," she told him and started to back away. "It was Rose Tyler…, Doctor."

She gave him a sad smile and then turned away and disappeared into the crowd of people. He felt his breathing quicken and he ran in the direction she went trying to find her. He didn't want to lose her again.

"Whoa there!" A hand grabbed his arm and pulled him back. "Where are you going in such a hurry, John?"

Turning his head he saw the nurse that had helped him before smiling up at him. She began turning him away from the hall Rose entered and towards another hall.

"Your room is this way, remember?" the woman said.

"But Rose!" he looked over his shoulder to the other hall. "I have to—"

"Oh! Did you make a friend?" the woman sounded ecstatic by the notion. "That's wonderful! You can see her tomorrow, though. It's suppertime now!"

He began to protest, but the woman just shushed him and pushed him along the hall in the direction of "his" room.

"Here you are, home sweet home!" the woman said as she opened the door to the small room. He begrudgingly went inside and grimaced at the food tray in its center.

"Now, enjoy!" the woman called out. "I'll check on you in a little while. Bye!"

The door clicked behind him and he heard the sound of heels clicking against the floor as the woman walked away. Turing about, he grabbed the door handle and twisted it trying to open the white door. It wouldn't budge.

Angrily he kicked it and yelped as pain shot through his bare foot. He then walked over to the food tray and stared down at its contents. A small ham sandwich sat on a plate with a glass of water and a cracker pack beside it. It looked revolting to him. Growling, he pushed the dolly and he wheeled away until it collided with the bed, spilling the dinner on its sheets. He didn't care. He wasn't hungry anyway.

Going over to the wall facing the window, he slumped down on the floor, bringing his knees up so he could rest his crossed arms upon them. A familiar position that he'd stayed that entire morning and evidently afternoon that day. He no longer kept track of time, it seemed to always blend together, molding all the hours into one.

He sighed heavily and buried his head in his arms. Why was he here? Why couldn't he remember things, _important_ things? He couldn't even recall his name. The nurse had called him John, but Rose had called him… what was it? Doctor? What kind of name was that? Both those titles sounded a little familiar to him, but they weren't his name. Who was he? All he wanted was to remember. To remember who he was, and who Rose was. She was important to him, somehow. He knew that. But why was she here? In the God forsaken asylum, where all the lunatics stayed?

That's what he was. He was a maniac, a mad man. Forced to be locked up here in this prison, because of his lack of memory. He'd lost his mind. He had no memories. No family that he could remember, no life before this, no name. All he could remember was one name, not his, but _Rose_. Rose Tyler. And he didn't even know if she meant anything to him.

He felt wetness against cheeks and brought a hand up to his face. Rubbing his eyes he saw salty tears had moistened his hand. Furious at himself for showing his emotions he wiped the rest of them away. He wouldn't sit here and cry like a helpless child!

He brought his hands up and ran them through his hair, tugging on the roots as if the pain would somehow help him to remember. Oh, how he wanted to remember. Who was he? All he could remember was vague images. He remembered a domed room, something blue, a gray beach, and blurry images of Rose Tyler. She was with him… traveling with him? No. Staying with him? What was she to him? His friend? Part of his family? His … Love? He wished he knew. Why couldn't he remember?!

Tilting his head back he banged his skull against the wall in dismay. Tears were still in his eyes, but he didn't care. His mouth opened in a silent scream and he gripped the roots of his hair with his fists. Pain seared through his head and he gnashed his teeth together. So, so much pain! All around him, and not of his own doing. He gripped his head in his hands and tried to shut out the agony. He could hear screaming in his ears. His screaming? He couldn't tell the difference, his head hurt so much.

His vision was blurring and he heard the sound of the room's door being opened and it colliding with the wall as someone came in. The screams were still echoing in his ears, except this time he was sure they were his.

Someone was gripping his shoulders and shouting. He didn't realize that he'd closed his eyes. Struggling, he opened them to see the blurry forms of people in front of him. Voices sounded through his screams and he covered his ears. There was so much noise. He let out a final wail as a wave of agony racked his head and his world faded to black.


	2. Remembering

"Sweetheart, Torchwood's doing the best they can," Rose ran a hand through her hair as her mum spoke. "You don't need to come help. Pete and the crew are doing exactly what he told them. They're making progress! And you want to stay there, you—"

"Mum," Rose interrupted, choking slightly as a tear rolled down her face. "He had another attack last night. I could hear him screaming, and they wouldn't even let me see him! I, I…"

Rose broke off and hung her head. Jackie was silent at the other end of the receiver. She had dialed her mother only a few moments ago. Phones actually weren't allowed at the _Malus Lupus _psychiatric institute, so she the only place she could actually call anyone was in the bathroom closet in her assigned room.

"They've kept him locked up for the whole day," Rose began again after recovering herself. "It's already fourteen hundred. Mum, I… I just don't know what to do. I'm useless here; they just think I'm another patient."

"Well you are another patient to them," Jackie said. "And that's just how it has to be. Besides, it lets you keep an eye on him there. You'd never forgive yourself if something happened to him."

"Something's already happened, mum," Rose cried quietly. "He's dying! And I can't do anything to help him! It's all my fault."

"Now stop that," Jackie's voice was stern. "Don't go blaming yourself for this. He especially wouldn't want that. This is all our fault, and all of us are going to fix this. And don't go saying you can't do anything to help. Having you there is helping him. Even if he doesn't… Even if he doesn't know you, he will _always _want you there."

Rose was silent for a moment. Then, "He remembered me, mum."

"Really?" Jackie sounded hopeful. "That's wonderful! Maybe he's recovering. You see? Maybe that thick Time Lord brain he keeps praising is actually helping and stopping the—"

"He remembered me and then had an attack," Rose stopped her mother from continuing. "It's just like before. Whenever he gets close to remembering something important, it, it just kills those thoughts. It's like it knows that if he remembers then he'll know how to stop it."

"It's a smart alien," Jackie said. "Just like the Doctor said."

"Especially if it's feeding of his memories!" Rose snapped. "The Doctor told me that his parallel self had to wipe all of Donna's memories of anything Time Lord in order to save her life because no other creatures can handle the power of a Time Lord's brain inside their heads. He regenerated saving my life from the Time Vortex when I tried. It was killing me! So why doesn't this bloody alien die from it?!"

"We don't know, Sweetheart," Jackie sighed. "We just don't know."

Rose wiped fresh tears from her face and cried, "Why did it have to take him?! It could have infected me instead!"

"And what good would that have done? We'd still be in the same spot we're in now!"

"No! The Doctor would have known what to do!" Rose yelled. "He always knows what to do! And now he's helpless! God! Why did it have to choose him?!"

Rose covered her face with her free hand and sobbed quietly. Jackie was silent on the other end as she listened to her daughter cry. Thick tears streamed down Rose's face and she wiped them away. It was all her fault. He fault he was like this. Because of her, he was…

"Rose," Jackie said after Rose had calmed down slightly. "Everything is going to be fine. You'll see. We'll have the Doctor in top shape in no time. Don't worry."

"I just," Rose murmured. "I just miss him so much."

"I know, dear," Jackie soothed. "We all do. Pete's trying to get my attention. I've gotta go, Sweetheart. I love you. Call me if anything else happens."

"Right," Rose blinked back tears. "Love you too. Bye."

Ending the call, Rose brought her mobile down and slipped it into the shoebox beside her. It was the only hiding place in this closet, besides stacks of various toiletry items.

Leaning her head back, she sat in the closet for some time, letting her tears dry on her face. She didn't want to think about it, but soon painful memories flashed in her mind.

"_Rose, I really don't think we should—"_

"_Oh, c'mon, Doctor," Rose rolled her eyes at the cautious Time Lord. "_You're _supposed to be Mister Explorer, not me."_

"_I _am _Mister Explorer," he told her. "But I think this time it might be best if we just left that thing alone."_

"_But we don't even know what 'it' is!" Rose stared down at the small cylindrical container. It was about a soda can's height with roughly a fifteen centimeter diameter. It had black coloring with a faint clouded gray texture that glowed whenever it was touched. The Doctor had told them that it was made of dwarf star alloy, which is a material impregnable to any radiation or particle and is the only material to that can hold time sensitive organisms, like Time Lords. The metal was very rare and especially shouldn't be found on Earth, the Doctor had said. Torchwood scans had showed them that the cylinder was hollow, which was the main reason Rose wanted to open the small object. But the Doctor was hesitant._

"_Exactly," the Doctor replied shoving his hands into his pockets. "And therefore, it could be dangerous. Well, then again, there really could be nothing inside that and it could just be an empty can that some alien was using. But we don't really know."_

"_Yeah," Rose gave him a smile. "And because we don't know, we should find out. What if it's like a time capsule or something?"_

"_An alien time capsule that randomly was left on Earth?" the Doctor cocked a brow and shook his head. "I highly doubt that."_

Rose got up from the closet floor and wiped her eyes. She didn't want to remember what happened next, but couldn't keep the memories from coming.

"_Why do you want to know what's inside so bad?" The Doctor asked her as he reached out a hand to pull her away from the black object._

"_Because it's something we've never seen before!" Rose said and looped her arms around his neck. "Something _you've _never seen before, which is saying something. And it's exciting!"_

"_Exciting? How? All it's done since we've found it is, wait, let me think, nothing," the Doctor nodded to the cylinder behind Rose. "How is that exciting?"_

"_Because-it's-something-that-we've-never-seen-befor e," Rose repeated flatly. "Don't you want to know if it has something inside?"_

"_Of course I want to know."_

"_Then why don't we find out?"_

"_Because I don't know if it contains something dangerous or not," the Doctor stepped away from Rose and went over to stand beside the cylinder. "I once unleashed a swarm of Krantilalos in Greece by opening an alien box that I didn't know what was inside. You know that myth about Pandora's Box? Yeah, that was me. Though I still don't know why they made me a girl. Not very becoming."_

"_Okay, so _one _time something went wrong when you opened something without knowing what was inside," Rose went over and bumped his shoulder. "But that was just one time. And you got to find out what was inside. Some other person would have opened that box anyway if you didn't. You saved ancient Greece from a disaster waiting to happen!"_

"_I caused a disaster, Rose," the Doctor frowned._

"_But then you fixed it," Rose smiled. "You always make things right. Mister Fix-It of space and time."_

"_Well," the Doctor said puffing out his chest a bit. Rose giggled earning a grin from the Time Lord._

"_So?" Rose said, drawing out the word._

"_So what?" the Doctor turned to her._

"_So are we going to open it?"_

"_I really don't think…" the Doctor trailed off as Rose gave him a sad pout, resting her chin on his shoulder. She knew he could never say 'no' the face she was giving him. Sighing, the Doctor raised his hands in defeat._

"_Alight," he said. "If you insist."_

"_Yay!" Rose laughed and gave him a kiss to the cheek. "Thank you!"_

"_Mmn, you owe me one now," the Doctor smiled tapping her nose with his finger. Rose grinned. _

_Reaching into his suit pocket, the Doctor brought out his sonic screwdriver. Well, his new one anyway. He had had the TARDIS make one for him when he and Donna had hidden out in the ship when the daleks had thought the TARDIS had been destroyed. It looked exactly like his old one, making Rose wonder if he had just "borrowed" that one from his other self and left him to make a new one._

"_Now, I just have to find the right setting to actually open this thing," the Doctor muttered to himself as he picked up the cylinder. He'd pulled out his specs (another item that he had "borrowed" from his other self) after the screwdriver and was now wearing them with a furrowed brow. His tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth in concentration as he soniced the object, moving the blue light around its edges._

Rose had sat down on the bed in her assigned room. She brought her knees up and curled herself into a ball on the mattress. She could hear rain falling against the windows outside as more flashbacks plagued her.

"_Almost got it," the Doctor growled. "Wait a minute—"_

_Without a warning the cylinder burst open with a loud crack sending sparks flying from its rim. Rose screamed in surprise and the Doctor covered his face dropping the object. It clattered to the floor, a large seam down its side but otherwise undamaged. _

"_It's empty," Rose noted gazing down at it. Then she went over to the Doctor and began looking him over with concern._

"_Are you alright?" she asked him looking at his face for any burn marks. "Did you get hit?"_

"_No, I'm," the Doctor frowned and brought a hand to his forehead. "I'm fine. Yeah, fine."_

_The Doctor gave himself a shake and looked over to the cylinder. Cautiously, he reached down and held it in his hands. He traced a finger down the crack curiously._

"_Hmm," he sniffed. "You're right. Nothing inside. I don't think…"_

"_I didn't see anything fall out," Rose went up beside him._

"_Some things aren't visible by the human eye," the Doctor muttered. "Or Time Lord, why we're at it. But… Nah, you're right. I don't think there was anything in here. Oh well."_

_The Doctor tossed the cylinder aside so that it landed on the lab table._

"_Darn, that's a bummer," Rose sighed. "I was hoping for something exciting."_

"_Well, we can still go do something exciting," the Doctor grinned and grabbed Rose's hands in his. "How 'bout you and me go get some chips and then go see a film? Hm? How's that sound?"_

"_That sound fun, but only if you're buying," Rose laughed. "What film anyway?"_

"_Aw, 007 of course!" The Doctor grinned broadly. _

"_Oh, you and Bond obsession," Rose smiled as she and Doctor started to head out of the lab. _

"_It just so happens that there are only a few films worth seeing on this small planet, and the 007 series just happen to be one of them," the Doctor said matter-of-factly. "Well, that and Harry Potter. And Lord of the Rings. But anyways! Oh, wait till you see the twenty-fifth Bond. Now, that, that was amazing."_

"_Well, when you get that TARDIS working, you can take me," Rose smiled with her tongue poking out through her teeth._

"_Hm?" the Doctor looked confused for a moment, with his brow furrowed. "Oh! Oh, yeah, of course!"_

"_What, did you like forget about the TARDIS or something?" Rose asked giving him a weird look. _

"_Nah, of course not," the Doctor shook his head. "How could I forget that?"_

Rose sat up from her bed and covered her face with her hands. It was all her fault. And that was only the beginning. At first there were only a few signs, nothing big. Like he'd be doing something sciency for Torchwood and leave and then come back only to forget what he had been doing previously. But that wasn't very unusual, happens to people all the time. He'd complain about getting headaches as well, but always blew them off as nothing.

But then it got worse. He'd leave Torchwood early because of the headaches, and when Rose would return to their flat she'd find him passed out on the couch. And he hardly ever got tired. He kept saying the pains were nothing and that he was fine. Said it was the "part-human" part of him, that just got tired every once in a while. And that's how it went for about a week.

And then started to get scary. Rose could remember coming home one day and finding the Doctor sprawled on the floor. She'd ran over to him and woken him up asking what had happened. But he said he couldn't remember. He had then scanned himself with the sonic screwdriver but couldn't find anything wrong with him. All he had were these headaches. He'd wake up in the middle of the night screaming and clutching his head in pain. Rose would always try to help him, but there was nothing she could do to stop the attacks.

Then one day it all changed. She and the Doctor were walking home from just having dinner with the Tyler family for the celebration of Pete Tyler's birthday, when Rose asked if he had a good time. All he did was furrow his brow and look to her confusedly. He asked where they were leaving from and where they were going now. Rose told him what they had been doing, and wondered how he could forget that, being it was not even an hour ago.

He said he didn't remember any of that and asked if Rose had just made it up. But he also asked what Rose's father's name was again, saying he was just blanking out on his name. That's when she realized something was seriously wrong.

She told her family and Torchwood immediately about the Doctor upon their return home. The Doctor said there was nothing wrong with him and probably had had too many drinks at the party. But Rose knew that wasn't true. The Doctor never drank.

They brought him into Torchwood and took some tests on him, much stronger ones than the sonic screwdriver could perform. The Doctor had monitored his test result diligently with Torchwood after seeing that Rose was worried about him. For hours they searched his system without finding anything. Everyone had thought that nothing was wrong with him, even Rose had begun to relax. But then they did find something.

The Doctor had recognized it immediately. His eyes were wide with dismay when the scans had indicated that something was infected in his head. He had ran out of the scan room and then returned shortly holding the empty cylinder that he had opened two weeks ago. He ordered Torchwood to scan it and match any traces on the object to what was inside of him. Everyone asked him to tell them what it was. But he said there wasn't enough time now. He told them to find away to destroy any traces left over on the cylinder, shouting at them and gripping his head. Rose had run over to him fearfully and he had turned to her. Pain was written across his features and he told her two words. _"I'm sorry." _

His whole body had given a massive shudder and he had collapsed to the floor, earning screams from Rose and the Torchwood crew. Rose had taken him home after that and dragged him into bed with help from Jackie. He didn't wake until the next afternoon. And when he did, he was different.

He said he didn't remember anything unusual from last night. Just having a horrible headache, through. Rose couldn't help herself and ran to him, hugging him close and crying into his chest. He'd quickly asked what was wrong and Rose just squeezed him tighter. Eventually when she had calmed she told him all that had happened. But it was like talking to thin air. His eyes were clouded and he would shake his head every few sentences. He couldn't remember anything.

Every day it got worse. Every morning he'd forget what had happened the day before and even more. He began to forget who he was. He forgot about the different worlds he'd visited, the Time Lords, different species, and even the TARDIS. Each day something about his past would be eaten away.

He wouldn't leave the house but just sit on the couch for hours on end. The headaches would still plague him as the alien disease took over his mind. Each time he would scream in pain until his voice gave out or he collapsed in exhaustion. There was nothing Rose could do to help him. All she could do was watch him writhe in pain.

She had tried to get him to go back to Torchwood to see if they could to anything to help him. The whole crew was desperately trying to find way to destroy the parasite without harming the host. But without the Doctor's help it was near impossible to find. The Doctor would have none of it anyway. He resisted against Rose taking him anywhere. But at least he had still known her…

Rose wiped the tears from her eyes. She knew she shouldn't be thinking about what had happened; she should be focusing on how to help the Doctor. But what could she do? She couldn't stop the attacks, or help find a cure for him here. She only could watch. Watch as the Doctor's life ebbed away. There was nothing she could do.


	3. Hurt

**A/N:** Thank you all for the comments! I appreciate them so much! But, if you've already read this story on tumblr, please don't spoil anything for the other readers! Thank you!

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He didn't like "social time". There was nothing sociable about it anyway. All of the patients just sat beside themselves. Nothing "social" about that. Well, granted, not _all _the patients were sitting around. There were a few people conversing with each other or playing cards and such. But only a _few. _

From where he sat in the L of a couch he watched his fellow patients. They didn't do very much. He didn't really know how long he had been sitting there. A nurse with a semi-familiar looking face had brought him out of his room that afternoon and left him in the large room with the other patients. The sky was too gloomy to tell what time it was by the sun, and he couldn't see any clock nearby. But it didn't really matter. What else would he be doing? Each day seemed to be the same. At least he thought they were. Then again, he couldn't really remember.

Reaching into his sweatshirt, he withdrew a small chain with a silver ring looped around it. He couldn't remember where he acquired it, or when for that matter, but he knew it was his. He began tracing his fingers around the band, feeling the cool of the metal.

"Hullo," a voice called out. Raising his head, he saw a stingy looking man with wide eyes standing before him.

"Hi," he replied and then dropped his gaze back down to the ring.

"He doesn't remember Thomas," the man muttered. He looked back up to the man and furrowed his brow. Who was this guy? He certainly hadn't seen him before.

"Ha! See, Thomas?" the man laughed and pointed to him. "He doesn't remember Thomas! Ha ha!"

The man kept cackling and walked away to go sit at a table with some other patients. The man began talking to them and pointing over to him on the couch, apparently telling how he forgot "Thomas".

Sighing he turned away, bringing his feet up to stretch in the other direction on the couch. He didn't remember meeting this Thomas fellow, but that was his problem. He couldn't remember anything.

He let his gaze wonder about the room, taking in the various people. Everyone seemed to look the same. Sweatshirts, t-shirts, and pajamaish comfort pants. Everyone was just a number in this stupid ward.

He noticed the nurse that had helped him this morning was talking to someone across the room. The woman turned and then pointed in his direction with a smile. Great, was he going to be taken to a different social room now? He doubted it would be much different than the one he was in now.

The woman seemed to finish her conversation and now moved away revealing who she had been talking to. He felt his heart skip a beat. It was her. _Rose. _

Without another thought, he was on his feet and making his way across the room to her. She had her back turned to him and was walking in another direction towards a hall that led to the rooms. He quickened his pace and soon caught up to her. Reaching out he caught her on the shoulder.

"Rose," he said happily. She turned to him with a confused expression. Then her face softened when she saw it was him and gave him a small smile. He felt his chest grow warm at that smile. Leaning forward, he wrapped his arms around Rose and squeezed her tight. She gasped in surprise. Realizing what he had just done, he pulled away feeling his cheeks grow hot.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry," he mumbled. "I don't know why I did that. I'm so sorry. I just, sorry—"

"It's alright," Rose laughed. "I don't really mind."

Giggling slightly, she reached up and hugged him around his neck. He smiled and pulled her closer, nuzzling her hair with his nose. She hummed softly and squeezed him tighter. He felt so… happy. Like this was just a normal thing. He could remember coming home after work and she'd be there. She would just smile at him and embrace him and they would laugh together. He could remember that. He could remember things with her.

_He could see her standing across the main console with a smile alit upon her face. He grinned and crossed the domed room over to her. Hoisting her up, he spun her around in a quick hug, giggling all the while. _

"_Mmm," she hummed when he released her. "Where are we going today?"_

"_You'll see!" he gave her a knowing smile._

Pain erupted inside his head pulling him away from his memories. His body shuttered and he released Rose, bringing his hands to his head and squeezing his eyes shut.

"Doctor!" he heard Rose gasp.

"I'm fine!" he lied between his clamped teeth. "Just a… _argh! _headache."

A hand rested on his arm and started to pull him away. Opening his eyes, he saw Rose was leading him toward the hallway that led to his room. He didn't want to go back there.

He tried to pull away, but another wave of pain racked his head. He groaned and his knees buckled slightly. He fell forward and Rose caught him. She grabbed his arm and put it around her shoulder so that he could lean against her.

"Rose, I, I'm fine. Really," he mumbled. She didn't answer but reached into a pocket on her pants and withdrew a small keycard. She brought it up and swiped the card against the lock to the hall door. A green light shown on the lock and the door opened with a click.

"Where did you get that?" he asked. His vision was starting to blur and he shook his head. He _wasn't _going to black out. No. He wanted to stay with Rose.

"Torchwood," Rose murmured, helping him down the hall.

"Torchwood?" he mumbled. He'd heard that name before. He'd been to Torchwood. With, with the metal men and creatures…

His head swam with pain again and he cried out.

"It's going to be alright," Rose whispered to him. "Just hold on. I've got you."

He saw spots swimming in front of his eyes and his vision went dark for a brief moment. He closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing, desperate to stay awake.

When he opened his eyes again he saw that he was in his room. He found his footing once more and walked over to his bed. He planned to collapse upon it, but apparently his feet had other ideas. Instead of falling on top of it, he misjudged the distance and fell halfway on bed, with his legs smacking against the floor. He grunted in pain and slipped off the bedside. Maybe he would just lie on the floor. His head felt groggy, but it wasn't throbbing anymore. He let out a sigh and rested his cheek against the cold floor.

"Any better?" a soft voice came beside him. Raising his head, he saw Rose kneeling down beside him. He'd forgotten she was there.

"I'm fine," he said and returned his head to its previous condition. "And perfectly comfortable on the floor."

"Sure," Rose said. "Do… Do you need anything?"

"Hm?" he sniffed.

"Do you want anything?" Rose repeated. "Like, to help with your headaches?"

"Nothing ever helps with those," he whispered and closed his eyes. Rose was silent. They stayed that way for a few moments, and he could hear Rose settling down on the floor. His head throbbed again and he winced, hissing in pain.

He felt a hand on his head and he stiffened slightly. Rose began to massage his head slowly, running her fingers through his thick hair. He let himself relax under her rhythmic ministrations. It was very soothing, and he let out a happy sigh.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Rose said and brought her hand away. "I shouldn't have, I mean, I…"

"Don't stop," he whispered. Rose was quiet from where she sat. Slowly she returned her hand to his temple and resumed her previous activities. He allowed himself to smile.

She used to do this when he first got the headaches. It really was the only thing that helped with the pains. He'd stretch out on the sofa, resting his head in her lap, and she'd massage his scalp until the pains subsided. He could remember that.

"Rose," he called out softly. "Who are you?"

"Just Rose," she told him. "Rose Tyler."

"But who are you to me?" He opened his eyes and looked up at her. She wouldn't meet his gaze and stared at the floor.

"I know you, remember you," he said as he sat up from the floor. "_You. _I don't remember anyone else, but I remember you. _Why?_"

"I don't know," Rose said softly.

"Yes, you do!" His voice rose slightly. The pains in his head were beginning to start again. "Why won't you tell me?"

"Doctor, I—"

"Doctor? Is that my name?" he asked. "No, no, that's not. I know it's not. I don't have a name. It's… It's not a name in this language."

"Yes," Rose said. "You're name is in Gallifreyin."

"Gallifrey is gone!" he cried and got up from the floor. "I saw it burn! I did it!"

He could see burning fire in his head. Thousands of people—but not human—crying out in pain. He knew how it felt to have the power to destroy worlds. But how did he know that? What was Gallifrey? A whole different world? Universe?

"I, I, see these things," he gripped his head as pain wracked it. "These images. From, from other worlds. But that's not possible! There are no other worlds. Just Earth! So how can I remember these things?!"

"Because there true!" Rose had gotten up from the floor and now stood beside him. "Everything you remember is true! Gallifrey existed. There are other worlds and universes! You've traveled them!"

"But how?!" he yelled turning on her. "How can that be? Who am I, Rose?! I want to remember! Who are you? Why do I remember things when you're around?! Rose, tell me! Please!"

He brought his arms up and gripped her shoulders, shaking her slightly. Fear flashed in her face and she tried to push him away.

"I don't know!" she cried.

"You don't know who I am?!"

"No! I do—"

"Then why won't you tell me?!" he hardened his grip on her. "All these things I have going through my head, and I don't know what is real or fake! Make it stop! Make the pain stop!"

"We're trying to help you!" Rose was pulling away from him. "Just calm down—"

"No!" he felt anger surging through him. "Whose 'we'?!"

"T-torchwood—"

"It was all their fault!" he yelled and lunged at Rose. She screamed as he pressed her against the wall, his hands on her throat. His head throbbed with pain and he burned with anger.

"They took you away! Banished you to a parallel world!" he cried. "How are you still here?!"

"I came back!" Rose pushed against his hands, trying to free herself. The pounding in his head was getting worse and his vision clouded with pain.

"My head, Rose! Why does it hurt?!" he growled. "Why?!"

"Because—" Rose tried to force out.

"NO!" he screamed constricting his hands around her throat. "Who are you, Rose?! _Who are you?!_ I want to remember you! Why are you important to me?!"

"Doctor—!"

"Why won't you tell me?!" he yelled.

"I—"

"TELL ME!"

"_You're hurting me!_"

Her cry echoed in his ears and his eyes widened. He looked down at Rose and released her in horror. Tears were streaming down her face and she gasped and coughed, catching back her breath.

He had hurt Rose.

He scrambled back away to the other side of the room. He'd hurt her. _He had hurt Rose._ His hands fisted his hair and he covered his face. The pain in his head continued, but it was nothing compared to the pain in his chest.

From across the room, Rose watched him as he sank to the floor, crouching down as he covered his head. He was shaking, his whole body trembling. It took her a few moments, but then she realized… he was sobbing. She could hear him crying softly through the silence.

Slowly she made her way over to him, wiping the tears from her face as she did. She knelt down beside him. Tentatively she reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. He flinched away.

"I promised I'd never hurt you," his voice was just a whisper. He moved his hands down and turned to her. His eyes were red and tears were down his face.

"I said I would keep you from harm," he said in a voice masked with pain. "Yet I'm the one who causes it."

Rose could see herself reflected in his eyes, and saw her own pain mirrored there. He held her gaze for a few moments and then glanced back down to the floor. Rose didn't know what to do. She wished she could comfort him and hold him close. But she was afraid to get near him. Every time she did he would get an attack. She couldn't bear to have him in pain again. She didn't care if she got hurt or what happened to her. She just wanted back to his normal self.

"You should go," he murmured. "It's not… I'm not safe."

Pain welled up in Rose's heart and she fought back tears. She didn't want to leave him. Looking over at him, she saw that his expression was blank and his eyes were hollow. He looked so alone. But he wanted her to go. Leaning forward she placed a kiss to his cheek.

"See you later," she forced out as she pulled back, hearing her voice quaver. He didn't acknowledge her and continued to stare blankly at the floor. Hanging her head, Rose got up from the floor and walked away. She paused at the door, and glanced back at him. He had covered his head with his arms and she could see him trembling once more. Feeling tears brimming in her eyes, she turned away and left the Doctor in his own darkness.


	4. Shards of Agony

It was dark outside now, with the night sky covering the heavens. Not a star was in the sky, though. The thick rain clouds still hung in the air even after having emptied themselves hours before. The rumble of thunder could still be heard occasionally. Every time the blares came, it sounded as if they were inside his head and pounding relentlessly.

He ran a hand through his thick hair, wincing in pain as another thunder rumble sounded. His head hurt so much. Groaning, he leaned his head back against the cold wall. He had been sitting where Rose had left him for hours now. He didn't even bother to move when the nurse from before came to give him supper. She had tried to make him come and eat, but he refused to budge. He just wanted to be left alone. At least he got his wish.

He deserved to be alone after what he'd done. He brought pain upon Rose, _his Rose_, and he would never forgive himself.

Another wave of pain struck his head and he screamed slightly. His voice was already hoarse from yelling before and his mouth was dry. He was probably dehydrated after so many hours without water or food.

Sighing, he brought himself up from the floor. His body was stiff from sitting in the same position for so long. Shuffling across his room, he went into the connected washroom and bent over the sink. Pain still throbbed in his head and he hissed, gripping the counter holding the sink.

He turned the faucet on and scoped the water in his hands, bringing it to his mouth and quenching his thirst. Then he splashed the cold liquid against his face seeking relief from his constant headaches. It didn't really help.

Grabbing a towel from the counter, he straightened up and dried his face. Then setting the rag aside he stared at his reflection in the mirror. Dark eyes stared back at him with shadows resting beneath them. His face was gaunt and stubble had begun to grow along his jaw. The man staring back at him looked so different he wondered if it was really him.

But then again, he didn't know what was really him. He couldn't remember who he was or what for that matter. He was no one. A lost soul with no memories. Rose said his name had come from another world. Gallifrey. The planet that's sky burned like fire and whose inhabitants were lost. All because of him.

Who was he? Who was he that he could destroy worlds and races whenever he desired? No man should have that power. He wanted to remember. He was tired of forgetting. The pain was unbearable. He couldn't keep living like this. Day after day, his memories left him, leaving him in the dark of his mind. The emptiness burned through him, surrounding him in flames of agony.

The man staring back at him in the mirror's face hardened with pain and narrowed his eyes. He clutched the sink counter as a wave of pain attacked his head. He stared at the mirror watching the man before him suffer. He was pitiful. No more. He couldn't take it.

Letting out a scream, he lashed out his fist against the mirror, striking it with tremendous force. The glass shattered, cascading down in hundreds of pieces. He fell back, covering his face and sank to the floor. Shards of mirror scattered against the ground like mosaic titles.

Opening his eyes he could see himself reflected in each piece. His knuckles were bloody from where he struck the mirror and his face was haunted. Yelling angrily, he hit the pieces of glass away, ignoring the pain in his arms as they sliced against his skin.

Bringing his hands up, he covered his face. Fragments of glass had clung to his fingers when he sought to rid the floor of the glass, and now scrapped against his features. He could feel blood seeping through his hands and he screamed. His shirt was drenched in blood from the shattered mirror. Pain traveled up his body and he trembled.

No more. No more pain. Why wouldn't stop? Everywhere it surrounded him. His head felt like a hornet's nest, buzzing and spinning with pain. He wanted it to stop. His hand closed around a large shard of mirror close to him and he held it up. His reflection stared back at him with agony across his features and tears in his eyes.

He could end the pain. He could end it right now and be free. All it took was a cut to his wrist and it would be over soon. Death would be a relief. He could do it.

But could he actually do it? Could he leave behind everything with the pain? He was the last of his kind. He'd killed the rest of his people, so why not finish the job? He was the last one.

But he wasn't was he? _He _wasn't the last of his kind. That was his other self. He was part human, not fully Time Lord. What was he? A copy? No. He was still him. Was he? He wanted to remember. He wished to know what he was. He wanted his memories! He wanted to remember his long life; the days alone, the days where he was sad or happy, the days that he wished would never end. He wanted to remember Rose. Oh, he wanted to remember.

Pain enveloped his head again and he cried out. He dropped the shard of mirror and clutched his head, wailing in pain. He screamed again and again, willing the agony to stop. It wouldn't stop. It never stopped.

He heard the door open and the sound of someone running across his room. He covered his head and gripped his hair, still wailing.

"Doctor! Oh my God, what have you done?" A voice called out filled with pain. He raised his head and saw her next to him. She pushed away the remaining shards of glass away with her shirt sleeve. Then she turned to him and gasped when she saw his battered face and shirt.

"Rose," he cried desperately. Tears were falling down his face staining his cheeks. He reached out and wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his head in her shirt. He felt her hands move up his back and against his head.

"I'm here," she murmured. "I've got you."

"Who am I?" he wailed, clutching her shirt. "_I want to know!_ It hurts, Rose. My head hurts so much."

"_Shh, shh, shh_," Rose kissed the top of his head. "Everything's going to be alright. We're going to help you."

"But it's so much pain!" his voice broke. "I can't do this anymore. I can't! I'd rather _die_ than live my life without my memories!"

"Don't say stuff like that!" Rose had tears in her eyes. "You can't, you can't go. I'm not going to lose you again!"

"_Who am I, Rose?!_"

"You're the Doctor, my Doctor," Rose pressed her head against his. "You're a Time Lord from Gallifrey, and the bravest man I've ever met. You're the captain of the TARDIS and the last of your kind. And I love you so much. I'll never stop loving you, even if you can't remember me."

"Rose," he cried softly. He could feel the throbbing in his head grow and he squeezed his eyes shut. Blood pounded in his ears and Rose's voice sounded miles away. She was shouting something, it sounded like a plea for help. He was screaming again as the pain over took his head. He curled his body up but still clung to Rose.

"_Doctor!_ Doctor, look at me!" Rose's voice broke through the drums in his head. He titled his head to stare at her through tear covered eyes.

"Hold on," she brought a hand to his face. "Just hold on, Doctor. We'll get through this. Just believe in me. Live for me, please."

"I… I can't," his voice was soft as tears fell down his face. The pounding in his head increased and felt himself losing consciousness. The last thing he remembered was the hospital nurses rushing in and Rose calling out his name.


	5. Lost

They wouldn't let her see him after what happened. They took him away and forced Rose to go back to her room. She had tried to resist, but they just locked her away and ignored her pleas. She didn't know how much of this she could take. The psychiatric ward thought they knew how best to help him, but they knew nothing. They couldn't help him.

Rose had stayed in her room for most the day, waiting for any news on the Doctor. She had called Jackie after seeing there was no way she would be let out of her room. Her mom had tried to comfort her, but to no avail. Even now, Rose was still partly in shock.

No one came to visit her in the early hours of the morning. She had sat on her bed in her blood-stained shirt, waiting for someone to let her out of this prison. She had to know if he was alright. There had been so much blood. It had covered the floor and mirror shards. And he had been in so much pain. He had wanted to end it. She had seen how much pain he had inflicted upon himself already. There were so many gashes and so much blood…

Her only comfort in the waiting hours was thumbing over the intricate designs on the small silver ring she wore around her neck. Each inscription was a word written in Gallifreyin, the circular writing of the Doctor's home planet. She remembered when the Doctor presented the ring to her. He had told her what the words in Gallifreyin meant. They were the same words he told her on that beach less than two years ago, and the same words he had told her every day since…

When finally someone did come to Rose's room, it was only to take away her bloodied clothing and give her some new garments. She had tried to ask the nurse about the Doctor, but the women had told her nothing. All she had said was that he was going to be fine, and they had taken him to the medical ward and he would recover, and be moved to a new room.

The rest of the day Rose had spent figuring out where they had moved him. She spent a good hour on the phone with Jake as he hacked through the psychiatric hospital's database. Eventually he had succeeded in finding the Doctor's new room, but he couldn't find any information on the Doctor's condition.

So now, here Rose was, walking down the hall that led to his room. The day was gone and the sun was beginning to set. This was the best time to go sneaking about, for the nurses were taking leave to their homes as the night shift came in.

No one met her in the corridor as she walked. Soon she reached a small room near the entrance of the hospital with a cardkey lock beside it. Rose withdrew her card from Torchwood and swiped it down the lock. A green light turned on and she heard the door click as it unlatched.

Cautiously, she opened the door and peered inside. The room was much smaller than the one she had been in before, but it still included a window, washroom, and a large bed. Rose felt her heart stop when she saw the crouched form on the Doctor sitting on the floor beside a wall. He had small bandages on the palms and backs of his hands, and they had changed him into a long-sleeved shirt. He sat with his knees pulled up and his arms crossed on top of them. His eyes were blank and he stared at the floor.

He didn't acknowledge Rose as she made her way across the room to sit next to him. She mirrored his position, but rested her head on her arms. They sat in silence as the sun set out the window. Rose tired to think of something to say, but was afraid to speak in case he asked her to leave again. She never wanted to leave him, ever again.

"They said I broke a mirror last night," the Doctor's quiet voice broke the silence and Rose turned to him. "Said I tried to hurt myself. They said you were there too."

The Doctor raised his head and turned to look at Rose. His eyes were clouded with pain, making Rose's heart ache.

"But the thing is," his voice cracked. "I don't remember any of it. Last thing I remember was waking up in this bloody room. I can't remember anything."

Rose said nothing.

"But that's not the worst bit," the Doctor strained. "Because… I… I can't remember your name. And I know I know you. I remember you."

Rose gave him a sad smile, blinking back tears, "It's Rose."

"Yes," the Doctor smiled and his face softened. "Rose. Rose Tyler... My sweet Rose."

"Yeah," Rose's voice broke. The Doctor leaned toward her and she did the same, laying her head against his shoulder as he rested his atop her hair. They sat together for some time, taking comfort each other's presence.

"I want to remember you," the Doctor's voice was barely above a whisper. "So, so much, Rose. My Rose."

"I know," Rose murmured. The sound of footsteps came from the hall signaling the nurses were going by and checking to see if the patients were in bed. Rose moved away from the Doctor.

"No, wait," the Doctor grabbed her hand as she made to get up. "Don't go."

"I have too," Rose whispered. "I'm not supposed to be here."

"_Please,_" the Doctor pleaded. "Just don't go."

"Doctor…"

"Rose, please," the Doctor had tears in his eyes. "Please, don't go. I'm afraid that I… I'm afraid I won't remember you next time. And I can't bear that. I don't ever want to forget you."

Rose felt her heart ache in pain for him as he stared up at her with tears trailing down his face. The nurses were still going from room to room down the hall, and would reach his room soon.

"Don't go," the Doctor begged in a whisper. Rose could feel his hands trembling as he held on to hers. Fear, pain, and sorrow were written across his visage. She couldn't bear to have him hurt any more. Bending down next to him again, she wrapped her arms around his chest. He returned her embrace burying his head in the crook of her neck.

"I don't want to forget anymore," he sobbed through her hair. "I don't want to forget, Rose. Just don't go."

"I'm never gonna leave you," Rose promised. The Doctor gripped her tighter crying into her shoulder and Rose felt tears in her own eyes. The Doctor's body shuddered.

"I don't want to forget. I don't want to forget," he kept on repeating. "I don't want to forget!"

He let out a wail and pulled away from Rose, his hands in his hair and gripping his head. Rose watched in terror as he doubled over, writhing on the floor with screams.

"Rose! Why does it hurt?!" he screamed. "Why?!"

"Everything's going to be alright, I promise," Rose went over to him. "You can fight it, Doctor. You're stronger than it! Look at me! Doctor, please!"

He met her gaze and she saw his was full of pain. His teeth grit together as he thrashed on the floor fisting the hair on his head. His screams echoed throughout the room making Rose's heart ache for him.

The door to his room burst open and Rose whipped her head around to see four nurses run in.

"What in God's name is going on here?" a woman yelled. "What are you doing here?! Mister Smith is not to be seen by anyone! How did you—?"

She broke off as the Doctor let out a tremendous wail. Two other nurses rushed over to him trying to get him to release his head. Rose made to go over to him, but the woman nurse and another male one grabbed her arms.

"Wait! What are you doing?!" Rose struggled. "Let me go!"

"You've done enough damage, Mrs. Tyler!" the male nurse grunted. "Now let's get you back to your room."

"No!" Rose yelled. "Let me go!"

The Doctor was still screaming and Rose struggled against the nurses as they pulled her back. He watched as they dragged Rose away and tried to get up from the floor, only to fall back down as another wave of pain hit him.

"No! Please!" he wailed. "Rose!"

"Let me go!" Rose pleaded. "He needs me!"

"Quiet!" the female nurse snapped.

"_Rose!" _the Doctor screamed from the floor. "You promised! You promised you'd stay with me forever!"

Rose felt tears fall down her face. The nurses forced her out of the room and slammed the door behind them. The last Rose saw of the Doctor was his terrified face staring over to her from the ground.

"ROSE!" she heard him wail through the closed door. Rose fought against the hospital staff, kicking and screaming to be released. They began to drag her down the hall and she heard the man call for security.

"_Let me go!_" Rose yelled. "Please!"

"I think it would be best if you did what my daughter said," a voice called out. Rose whipped her head around to see Pete Tyler standing at the hospital's lobby with the Torchwood crew behind him.

"And I think I'd like you to do it now," Pete continued nodding to the gun carrying soldiers beside him. The hospital nurses released Rose in shock.

"By order of President Harriet Jones," Pete raised his badge from Torchwood. "I demand you leave Mister Smith alone and leave us be. Now, clear off!"

The nurses nodded and scampered down the hall. Pete turned to Rose.

"Are you alright?" he said giving her a quick hug. "Rose we—"

"I'm fine," Rose wiped the tears from her face. "But the Doctor's having another attack. They keep getting worse, especially this one!"

"Right," Pete turned to his men. "Jake, Owen, Gwen, get the rest of the nurses out."

They three nodded and ran over to the Doctor's room. Jake kicked down the door and shouted at the men inside and the nurses ran out with screams. Rose darted into the Doctor's room and found him still screaming on the floor.

"Doctor! Doctor, I'm here!" Rose went over to him. He didn't acknowledge her but continued to thrash on the floor. Gwen Cooper came up to the Doctor and began scanning him with a small device, much like the sonic screwdriver.

"Sir, he's fading," Gwen addressed Pete.

"We have to do something!" Rose looked over to them. "I can't let him die!"

"We've found away to destroy the parasite," Toshiko spoke up joining them.

Rose felt hope flare up in her chest, "Then why—?"

"But we don't know if it will hurt the host as well," Pete said gravely. "We haven't done enough tests."

"We don't have much time, sir," Gwen was looking back to the device in her hands. The Doctor let out a tremendous bellow from the floor and Rose ran her hand through his hair soothingly. Tears were spilling down her face.

"I've got you," she sobbed. "Everything is going to be fine."

"Jake, Owen, stand the Doctor up," Pete ordered and pulled Rose away from him. The men did as he asked, looping their arms under the Doctor's. The Time Lord screamed in pain as they brought him to his knees, his eyes squeezed shut and his head hanging.

"Wait, what are you doing?!" Rose cried.

"We don't have any choice, Rose," Pete told her. "Ianto!"

Ianto Jones came into the room carrying a small case and opened it before Pete. Reaching in, Pete withdrew a large syringe filled with a burgundy liquid. The Doctor thrashed in Owen and Jake's grip, wailing all the while.

"No, you can't!" Rose yelled and rushed forward only to have Tosh hold her back. Pete moved over to the Doctor and forced his head down.

"I'm sorry, Rose," he said. "But it's the only thing we can do!"

He brought the needle down at the back of the Doctor's neck, injecting him with the serum. The Doctor let out an ear-splitting screech and his body went limp. The life seemed to leave him, and if Jake and Owen hadn't been holding him he would have crumpled to the floor.

Rose watched him in shock, her breathing labored and tears down her face. Gwen brought her scanner next to the Doctor and scanned his body.

"He's holding," she gave a relived sigh. "His heart rate's low, but he's holding."

"Good," Pete turned to Jake and Owen. "Carry him to the bed. Careful though, try not to move him much."

They did as ordered, cautiously placing him on the bed. Rose broke out of her shock and ran over to his side. Pain was still written over his unconscious face. Gingerly, Rose brought a hand up and began caressing his cheek.

"Tell me he'll be okay," her voice was hoarse as she turned to Pete. He avoided her gaze and looked to the floor.

"We'll know in the morning," he said in a hushed tone. "I'm sorry, Rose. It's all we can do for him."

Rose turned away and back to the Doctor. Her vision clouded with tears and she let them fall, crying silently. This was all her fault. She was going to lose him again…

She turned back to the Torchwood crew.

"Thank you for everything," she told them holding back more tears. "I'm… I'm going to stay with him."

"Quite alright," Pete murmured. "We'll leave you be."

"Thank you."

Pete gave her a nod and then walked out the door motioning for troop to follow.

"Gwen, Owen," he addressed the two. "I want you two to stand guard on the door. Make sure no one comes in."

"Yes, sir," Gwen nodded.

"Jake, Tosh, Ianto," Pete called to them. "Return back to base with me. And Rose?" He turned back to her, "We'll check on you in the morning. And… And I'm sorry. So sorry."

Rose didn't move from her position on the side of the bed, and continued to stroke the Doctor's face. Seeing there was nothing left they could do, Pete turned and left the room with the rest of the crew following.

"Don't leave your posts at any cost," he told Owen and Gwen. "I'll make sure no one bothers you. In fact, I'll do that now. Jake, go with Ianto and alert the hospital that no one is to disturb this room. Tell them these two have the permission to tranquilize any violators."

"Yes, sir, I'm on it," Jake saluted. He motioned to Ianto and the two started down the hall.

"Hey, get us some coffee while you're at it, Ianto," Owen called out.

"That's not the only thing I do, you know!" Ianto called over his shoulder.

"Sure, mate," Owen snickered, but a stern glare from Gwen silenced him.

"This is no time for jokes," she snapped. "Now shut up."

Pete nodded in agreement and growled, "If you disturb Rose in anyway, you can find yourself another job. Got that?"

"Yes, sir," Owen bowed his head. "Sorry, sir."

A few minutes later, Jake and Ianto returned, with Ianto carrying two cups of coffee. Pete and Jake left the hospital and Ianto soon followed after giving the mugs of warm liquid to Owen and Gwen.

"I hope he'll be okay," Gwen said after they had gone.

"Of course he will," Owen assured her. "He always pulls through. He's the Doctor."

"I know," Gwen sighed. "But if he doesn't… I don't think Rose would ever recover. She spent four years trying to find him, and if she lost him again…"

"I know," Owen looked to the floor. They could hear Rose crying from behind the door. Both were quiet for the rest of the night, trying not to think of what would happen to Rose if the Doctor never recovered.


	6. Darkness

_He could hear the sound of a key being turned in the lock and he raised his head to look at the door. Who would have a key to his flat? Soon the door opened and a woman with shoulder length golden hair and hazel eyes walked in. She seemed familiar to him, but he didn't know how._

"_Hey," she said and went over to where he was lying on the couch. She reached out a hand and ran it through his hair slowly. He watched her carefully. It wasn't a usual thing for someone to come into his flat and ruffle his hair._

"_Er, uh, what are you doing?" he asked, shying away from her._

"_Oh, sorry," the woman said. "Was that hurting you?"_

"_Er, no," he sat up from the couch. "But I don't usually have people run their fingers through my hair... Especially people I don't know."_

_Sorrow seemed to cover the woman's face. She straightened up and looked him over. Her hazel eyes swam with sadness. He wondered what had bothered her. Whatever it was he wished it would stop. He didn't like seeing her in pain like this._

His head wreathed with pain. Darkness surrounded him and he sought out light. He tried to open his eyes, but the effort seemed too much. Someone was next him and touching his face. He could hear whoever it was crying. Why was she crying?

_From the back seat of the car he could see tears falling down the girl's face. It hurt him to see her like this. Why was she crying? The other woman, Jackie, had said that her name was Rose. The name sounded familiar to him… Did he know her?_

_Hesitantly, he reached a hand out and rested it on her shoulder. She let out a small sob and placed her hand over his. He squeezed her shoulder, trying to find a way to comfort her. He didn't want to see her cry. She leaned her head against their hands, closing her eyes, with grief written across her face._

Shadows over took his memories again and he shuddered as another wave of pain washed over him. He wanted to remember. Why was he here? Why was everything so dark? He could feel, smell, and hear everything around him. But why couldn't he see?

_A man was standing next to him now. Pete, the man had said his name was. He was leading him away to the large building. They were standing in the parking lot after arriving at their destination. He didn't know why these people were taking him somewhere, but they all seemed upset. _

_Looking over his shoulder, he could see Rose hugging herself as she cried. He couldn't bear it anymore. Turning around, he ran over to her and wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace. She stiffened at first, but then brought her hands around him pulling him closer. She sobbed into his shoulder and he felt his chest ache. Bringing a hand up he stroked her hair, trying to quiet her. _

"_Why are you crying?" he asked pulling away slightly. "What happened?"_

_Rose took a while to speak but then, "I… I lost someone… so, so dear to me."_

"…_I'm sorry."_

_She looked up at him with tear-filled hazel eyes. He knew those eyes. _Rose…_ He brought a hand up to her cheek and softly wiped her tears away. She took his hand in hers and brought it away._

"_You… you should go," her voice was hoarse. _

"_Will you be alright?" he wished she would stop crying._

"_Just go," she sobbed and pushed him away. He didn't want to go. His home wasn't at the large building; it was in his flat with..._

She was still beside him. Her hand encased around his. She was curled up on the bed and he could hear her steady breathing. She must have drifted to sleep. He wished he could sleep as well, curled up next to her with his arms around her waist and his face pressed in her hair.

"_Rose," he whispered into her hair. "Look at me please."_

_She lifted her head from his shoulder slowly and turned to him. Her beautiful hazel eyes sparkled in the soft lamp light as she stared up at him with grief. Gingerly, he brought a hand up and cupped her cheek._

"_I need you to promise me something," he murmured._

"_Anything," Rose moved her hand over his on her cheek._

"_If, if," he broke away from her gaze. "If I get worse, and, and start forgetting important things—"_

"_That's not going to happen," Rose stopped him. "We're going to get you well."_

"_Yes," he tried to smile. "But if you don't find a cure in time, for whatever is wrong with me, I need you to lock me away in a hospital ward."_

"_What?"_

"_Put me somewhere people can look after me constantly," he muttered. "I don't know what I could do if I lose my memories. I could hurt people… I could hurt you."_

"_I can watch over you," Rose said. "Torchwood too. I'd never let anything happen to you."_

"_But you can't stay with me every hour," he looked up to her and saw pain in her eyes. "You have to help Torchwood. And I don't know if I… If I forget you, Rose…" _

_He blinked back tears and pulled Rose closer to him on the couch, wrapping his arms around her in an unyielding embrace. She caressed the back of his neck as he nuzzled his cheek against hers. He didn't want to forget…_

"_If you have to go, then I'm going with you," Rose murmured, pulling away slightly to look him in the eye. He saw a tear trail down her cheek. Reaching out he placed a hand to her cheek again, wiping away the tear with his thumb._

"_Oh, Rose," he whispered. Bringing his hand to the back of her neck, he pulled her forward so that he could press his lips softly against hers in a tender kiss. Her cheeks were wet from fallen tears and he felt moisture on his own. _

"_I love you, Rose Tyler," he said softly to her when they broke apart. "So, so much. And I will _always _love you."_

He was tired of the darkness. He didn't want it anymore. Slowly he blinked open his tired eyes. His vision was blurry in front of him and he blinked a few more times to bring the world in focus. Where was he? He was staring up at a white ceiling. He moved his gaze around, taking in his surroundings. A room. It was definitely a room. And he was lying down. He could feel soft linen sheet wrapped around him and a pillow behind his head. At least he was in a bed.

Something brushed his hand. Looking down at his chest, he saw a woman's hand laying over his own. He tried to turn his head to see who was beside him, but a wave of pain seared through his neck. It hurt so much that he felt as if he would black out again. He lay perfectly still, focusing on his breathing until the pains subsided.

His eyes felt heavy and he could feel sleep trying to overtake him. He didn't want to go back to the darkness. He glanced down to his chest again. Mustering up the strength he had, he brushed his thumb against the back of the woman's hand. Exhaustion washed over him from just the slightest movement.

He felt the hand on his flinch and he heard the bed creak as someone moved beside him. Through half-lidded eyes, he saw a person come into his vision. Golden hair surrounded her face and hazel eyes met his.

She was saying something, but he couldn't hear her. His eyes were closing. Desperately he fought to stay awake, but to no avail. A hand was on his cheek and he glanced up at women hovering above him. Tears were in her eyes and she was mouthing something over and over to him. Pain coursed through his head and his world faded to black once more.

The room was brighter the next time he opened his eyes. It must be day. The pain in his head still lingered, but it wasn't as bad as it was before. He lay staring up at the ceiling, breathing steadily. He didn't know how long he stayed like that, but he didn't really care. Relaxing like this brought his mind off the pain.

Gritting his teeth, he turned his head to his left. Spots swam before his eyes for a few moments. When they eventually focused, he felt his heart skip a beat.

Resting beside him, with her arms crossed over the bedside and sitting in a chair next it was a woman with golden hair. Her eyes were closed and her head rested on her arms.

Opening his mouth slightly, he breathed her name, "_Rose._"

She stirred and raised her head. Exhaustion was written over her face, but as soon as she saw him her face lit up.

"Doctor!" she cried and got up from the chair to sit on the bedside next to him. She brought a hand to his face, cupping his cheek. Her eyes were filled with pain and he could see tears threatening to fall down her face. He felt his body shutter involuntarily and a chill ran down his back. A moan escaped from him. He pushed his face against her hand, seeking warmth and comfort.

"I'm here," Rose whispered caressing his cheek with her thumb. "You're going to be alright. I'll take care of you."

He could feel pain creeping up his head again. His face contorted with agony and he cried out. Rose stroked his cheek again, murmuring soft words. He could see she was struggling not to cry, blinking back tears. He didn't want her to cry. He'd rather go through more pain than have her suffer.

"Rose…," he whimpered, feeling his eyes closing once more.

"It's alright," her voice broke. "I'm here now. I'm not gonna leave you."

"Rose," he repeated. "My… My Rose."

Tears were falling down her face now and she nodded at him. Shaking, he reached his hand up and tried to wipe away her tears. He barely touched her face before his strength ebbed and his arm drooped. Rose caught his hand and held it to her cheek, giving him a soft smile despite the grief on her face.

"I… I…," he stammered, running his thumb over her features. "I... remember… you."

Each word was forced out as he felt his consciousness slip away. His body shuttered and he forced himself to stay awake. _Rose. _He wanted to stay with Rose. Exhaustion overtaking him, his hand fell from her face and his eyes began to close.

"Doctor? Doctor, stay with me!" Rose pleaded. "Don't go. _Please._ Look at me. _Please, look at me!_ Doctor!"

He wanted to. He really wanted to. But his eyes drifted closed and his body gave a massive shudder. He could still hear Rose calling to him, begging him stay. Each plea was a jab to his heart.

_He could see the pain written across her face as she walked up at him. Extending her arm she brought a hand to his face saying, "Can I—?"_

"_I'm still just an image," he whispered shaking his head. "No touch."_

"_Can't you come through properly?" her voice broke slightly as she brought her arm down. He felt his hearts quench up in pain. _

"_The whole thing would fracture," he said. "Two universes would collapse."_

"_So?"_

_He smiled softly. Rose glanced away and he could see tears brimming in her eyes. Pain welled up in his chest. He desperately wished he could touch her. To hold her in her arms again._

A hand was on his arm. It was the only thing he could feel in the darkness. His body felt like it was on fire. He shuddered and let out a cry in pain. It was burning through his head!

_He opened his mouth in a silent scream, gasping for breath as he collapsed to the floor. His whole body burned within him. Crawling along the floor, he dragged himself out of the airlock, coughing and gasping in pain. Fire burned from beneath his eyelids, trying to force them open. He held his head in his hands struggling to fight the thing inside him. _

_The pod docked behind him and felt the floor shake beneath him._

"_Doctor!" Martha's voice called out. "Doctor! Are you okay?" _

_He felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned away from the floor to face her. His eyelids opened briefly, letting the golden light burn beneath them._

"_Stay away from me!" He screamed and forced his eyes shut._

His eyes flew open. Blurry forms of people we're all around him. Someone was wiping sweat from his brow with a damp towel. He could hear voices all around him. His eyes scanned the room, searching for her. He called out her name.

"I'm here," Rose's voice was close to him as his eyes closed. "I'm not leaving."

"_I promised Jackie I'd always take you back home," he raised his head. He'd trapped her here. They had no TARDIS and no means of getting back to Earth. Well, Rose's Earth anyway. _

"_Everyone leaves home in the end," Rose said looking up at the black hole._

"_Not to end up stuck here."_

"_Yeah," Rose said. "But stuck with you, that's not so bad."_

_He turned to look at her across the table. He murmured, "Yeah?"_

"_Yes," Rose turned and smiled at him. He smiled in return, glad Rose was with him. He couldn't imagine a better person to get stranded with it._

The pain in his head was unbearable. Like sharp knives it struck him again and again. He screamed each time, until he couldn't scream. He fought for breath, taking in gulps of air. He couldn't seem to get enough. The excruciating pain continued, making his whole body tremble. He was dying. But he couldn't regenerate this time.

"_I've only got one life, Rose Tyler," he said looking down at her with a small smile. "I could spend it with you, if you want."_

"_You'll grow old at the same time as me?" she whispered with the faintest trace of disbelief in her voice._

"_Together," he smiled. She shook her head a little and stepped forward. Hesitantly she placed a hand on his chest feeling his one heart beating beneath it. He smiled softly at her as she stared up at him with tear filled eyes._

_The TARDIS revved behind the other Doctor and Donna and all eyes glanced back to it._

"_We've got to go," the Doctor said looking to Rose. "This reality is sealing itself off, forever."_

_The Doctor turned away, trying to hide the sadness in his face. His other self watched him, knowing how he must be feeling. He never wanted to leave Rose again… and maybe he would never have to._

"_But, it's still not right," Rose ran after the Doctor and Donna. "'Cause, the Doctor's still you."_

_The words cut through him like shards of glass. She didn't think he was the same. She would never accept him. How could he think she would? She belonged to be in the TARDIS with the Doctor...not stuck on Earth with him._

"_And I'm him," the Doctor said nodding to him._

"_Alright. Both of you," she turned back to him and then to the Doctor as they both went up and stood beside her facing each other. "Answer me this. When I last stood on this beach, on the worst day of my life, what was the last thing you said to me? Go on, say it."_

"_I said, 'Rose Tyler,'" the Doctor said looking at her and trying to hide his pain._

"_Yeah, and how was that sentence gonna end?"_

"_Does it need saying?"_

_Pain flashed in Rose's eyes and she turned to look at the other man beside her, "And you, Doctor? What was the end of that sentence?"_

_He exchanged a quick glance to the other Doctor, who raised his head slightly as if allowing him to say the words that he could never say. Turning to Rose, he placed a hand on her arm and leaned down next to her ear._

_He whispered the words to her with all his heart. And he meant them. He would always mean them, and nothing would ever change his heart. He loved her, more than anything in the entire universe._

_He pulled back, and looked down at her. Her expression was unreadable. She wouldn't accept him…_

_Rose reached out and grabbed him by the suit lapels, pulling him towards her. Her lips met his and he found himself closing his eyes. She moved her arms around his neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. Unable to hold back anymore, he wrapped his arms across her back holding her as close to him as he could. He worked his mouth against hers feeling his one heart pound in his chest. She brought her hand up to caress the back of his head and he just squeezed her tighter._

_The TARDIS roared to life behind him and she pulled away. He released her and she ran after the disappearing ship as it faded from sight. She stopped a few feet away as the ship vanished leaving only an echo of the ancient grinding gears. _

_Slowly he walked up beside her and slipped his hand into hers. Rose squeezed his fingers in return. Only once the sounds of the TARDIS had faded did she turn and look at him. He saw pain in her eyes and tears were threatening to fall. _

_He gave her a small smile and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her in a comforting embrace. She leaned against his chest, crying softly, but clutching him to her. Pressing his lips to the top of her head, he silently promised her he would never leave again. No matter what happened, he would _always _stay with her._

He wasn't going to leave. He wanted to find Rose and tell her that, but he didn't have enough strength to move, let alone open his eyes. He was still in darkness. Cold air was around him and he shivered. He couldn't feel anyone beside him. He listened for the comforting sound of Rose breathing but there was none. He was alone.

_He walked through the rubble, feeling blood trickle down his face. He had to get back to the TARDIS. The ground shook beneath him, signaling the impending danger. Tilting his head to the sky, he could see the orange heavens littered with smoke and fire. He winced as an explosion came beside him showering him with rocks and ash. He didn't have much time left._

_Looking ahead he saw the TARDIS leaning against a dalek ship. Deep gashes were in the wood and its windows were shattered. It had been through hell and back, but it was still standing. _

_He limped toward it, sidestepping detritus of the battle and the bodies of his kin. He tried not to look at the faces of the fallen Time Lords. He'd killed them. Destroyed them all. But they deserved it. They brought this upon themselves and the daleks._

_He thrust open the TARDIS door and it swung inward on broken hinges. He ran as fast as his legs would allow him to the main console. Many of the levers were broken off already and the time rotor was cracked. With his bloodied hands shaking he charted a course away from the dying planet._

_The TARDIS groaned in protest and he kicked the main console angrily. He had to get away. The time rotor moved up and down slowly and he felt the ship rumble as it entered the time vortex. But it didn't stay there long. Giving a massive shutter the time rotor stopped. _

_He limped over to the TARDIS doors and opened them. Below he could see Gallifrey burning. Cracks cut through its surface and fire rippled out covering his home. Without warning, the planet split, exploding in space. He turned away as the fire glowed beneath him. The screams of his people echoed in his ears and he tried to shut them out. So much screaming. He yelled with them and slammed the TARDIS doors. The TARDIS lurched as it was hit by the blast. The inner windows shattered and the metal beams supporting the domed room split. _

_He could feel the regeneration energy burning within him as he stumbled to the main console. He fumbled with the controls forcing the TARDIS to get back into the time vortex. Soon this part of the universe wouldn't exist, he'd time-locked it. Gallifrey had to die. He couldn't save it._

_Tears brimmed in his eyes. Everyone was gone. His family, his life, his friends… he could never see them again. He would never see the twin suns rise in the burnt orange sky or walk through the silver-leaved forests. He was alone now, there was no one left. He committed genocide on two races. Destroyer of worlds. _

_Titling his head back he let out a wail, mourning his race. Golden light came out of his hands and face and surrounded his body. He cried through it all. He didn't deserve to continue living. He was the last of the Time Lords… only because he killed them all._

He didn't want to remember anymore. Why would he ever want to remember? The pain in head had stopped only to be replaced with a greater pain in his heart. Opening his eyes to the dark of the room he stared up at the ceiling. He could feel tears running down the sides of his face.

_Tears streamed down his face as he turned his eyes to look up at Rose. She brought a hand to his face._

"_Hold on," she pleaded. "Just hold on, Doctor. We'll get through this. Just believe in me. Live for me, please."_

_The pain in his head increased and he felt himself losing consciousness. His voice was soft as he wept, "I… I can't."_

He blinked away the memory. Feeling more tears in his eyes he looked around the dark room. He needed to know someone was there. He needed… Rose. Mustering the strength he had, he pushed himself up into a sitting position. Immediately pain shot down his neck and back. He hissed and grit his teeth, but he wouldn't allow himself to black out.

"Rose?" he called out softly. Everything was dark by him. Tossing the covers off him he put his feet on the cold floor. His body was trembling slightly, with large spasms every so often. He brought his hands to his face cradling his head. The drumming in his head still lingered faintly.

"_I thought it would stop, but it never does. Never ever stops," the Master said across the phone line. "Inside my head, the drumming, Doctor. The constant drumming."_

He groaned and shook his head. Is this what he was to become? Driven insane by the pain? He tugged at the roots of his hair and tilted his head up. Where was everyone? Where was he? And Rose? They'd taken her away. Where? He needed her. She was everything to him.

"_Rose?_" he called again, pleading this time. He could hear muffled voices outside. Pain shot up his neck again and he hung his head. He ran his hands through his hair, crying out and holding his head as his body shuddered.

He heard the door to the room open. Someone ran across the floor and he felt two hands on his shoulder.

"Doctor—!" a panicked voice called out.

"No," he moaned pushing away the newcomer. "Where's Rose? Where is she?"

"I'm right here," the voice said. He opened his eyes focusing on her and blinked back tears. Rose brought a hand to his face, caressing it softly. He let out a sob.

"I'm here, I'm here," she murmured and went to sit beside him. He reached out and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. She returned his embrace, pressing her cheek against his. His body trembled and he gripped her tighter. He never wanted to let her go.

"Doctor," Rose whispered and pulled back slightly. "Doctor, look at me."

He raised his gaze and met her hazel eyes. There was sorrow buried deep within her gaze. She opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off.

"Why did you leave me?" his voice broke.

"I, I didn't want to," Rose quavered. "Dad—Pete told me that, and I—"

He didn't care. Pulling her to him again, he silenced her with his lips, kissing her softly. She tensed at first but he wrapped his arms around her again tangling his hand in her hair and placing one to her face. His fingers brushed her temple.

_She turned her head and felt a smile cross her face. The Doctor was walking toward her slowing gaining speed with a wide grin. His hair was still styled back in a ridiculous Teddy boy quiff. As he neared her, she spread open her arms and he spun her around in a tight hug. She could feel him smiling against her blue jacket._

His eyes flew open and he pulled back. That wasn't one of his memories. He'd seen hers, Rose's. How could he do that? He looked Rose up and down, and she stared at him in confusion. His body trembled slightly. Bringing his hands up to his head, he covered his face once more.

"Doctor?" Rose put a hand on his shoulder. "Doctor, look at…"

He turned to her, looking at her through tear filled eyes. Slowly he spread his arms in a silent request. Rose reached forward and brought him close, his head resting against her collarbone and his arms clutching her waist. He cried against her, wishing with all his heart he would remember… remember everything.

"I've got you," she kissed his head. "I'm not going to leave. But _you_ have to stay. You can't… you can't die."

He could hear so much pain in her voice as she held him to her. He gripped her tighter, trying to form words. He wanted to promise her everything. He never wanted to leave.

"I love you," Rose leaned down and whispered in his ear. His eyes widened as she murmured another word, a name, like a song. It was _his_ name…

_He crawled across the bed over to her with a foxy grin across his face. Draping himself over her, he propped himself up on his elbows so that he hovered a few inches above her. Rose wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his head down to hers. He kissed her passionately, forcing her mouth open with his tongue and causing her to moan with pleasure. She pulled at the hairs on the back of his neck and he growled in response. Pulling back, he latched himself to her neck, trailing her collarbone with open, wet kisses._

"_Doctor!" Rose screamed and dug her nails into his bare shoulders. He smiled against her skin and continued to make a path of kisses up her throat. She shuddered under him and he could feel her heart beating rapidly beneath her perfect skin. _

"_Rose," he whispered in her ear, forcing himself away from her neck. "I'm going tell you something… and I don't want you to ever forget it. But you mustn't tell anyone."_

"_Yes?" Rose said as she turned her head slightly and placed a kiss to his jaw. With his voice below a whisper, he murmured a word in Gallifreyin to her. It sounded like a song as it left his lips. It had been so long since he spoken those sounds._

_He pulled back and stared down at Rose. She had tears in her eyes and he brought a hand up and brushed her cheek lovingly._

"_It's beautiful," she whispered. "What does it mean?"_

"_It's my name," he leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I just told you my name."_

_Rose smiled and reached up and caressed his cheek. Tilting her head up, she whispered back his name and added, "I love you."_

"_I love you too, Rose Marion Tyler," he said, kissing her face between each word._

Pain enveloped his head, ripping him away from his memories. Rose held on to him and called out his name. He let out a scream and shuddered. His body went limp and his vision was engulfed in darkness once more.


	7. Losing Hope

Rose stood leaning against the wooden door frame. The room was dark in front of her with only a small lamp shining light from the bedside table. The faint glow blanketed the bed casting shadows across the face of the Doctor as he lay unconscious there. His eyes moved beneath their lids and his chest rose and fell barely, signaling he was still alive. Sweat glinted on his forehead, but his body shuddered as if he was freezing.

He wasn't getting any better. Three days had passed since they had injected him with the medicine that would destroy the alien festering in his brain. And for three days he drifted in and out of consciousness. Rose had stayed by his side when she could, never wanting to leave. The one time she did indeed leave, by order of Pete to rest, he had woken up and tried to find her. He remembered her. She still had hope…

Pete had decided that it was time to leave the mental institution after the Doctor had woken up. If he was well enough to move by himself, then that was the all clear for Torchwood to remove him from there and back to where they could watch him without the hospital staff interfering. They had brought him back to Rose and his flat. Pete and Jackie had stayed with Rose for a couple of hours waiting to see what the Doctor would do. Now she was alone. The day was gone and it was already halfway through the night.

Rose crossed the bedroom over to the Doctor. Grabbing a damp cloth from the adjacent table, she gently mopped the sweat from his brow. He shuttered as the cloth touched his skin.

"_Shh shh, _it's all right," she murmured brushing his temple with her thumb. He seemed to relax a little at her voice. Eventually his breathing steadied, signaling he had finally entered a deep sleep. Rose returned the towel to its original place and gazed down at the Doctor's sleeping form. He seemed so peaceful like this. It was almost like there was nothing wrong and he had just fallen asleep. In a few hours he would wake and everything would be fine. She wished that were true.

Sighing, Rose turned away from him and went into the connected room of the sleeping quarters. She made short work of undressing herself and hopped into the shower for a quick rinse. It felt good to get out of her old clothing and wash up. She dressed into her sleepwear after drying herself off, and brushed her teeth. Her gaze rested on the Doctor through the mirror, watching him sleep.

Once she had finished, she made her way back across the room to him. She turned out the light beside him and then went around to the other side and crawled into bed. The moonlight shown through a window casting barred shadows across the bed sheets.

Rose lay on her side watching the rise and fall of the Doctor's chest. She gradually moved toward him until she was nestled against his side. Draping her arm across his chest, she felt his single heart beating unevenly beneath her palm. Tears welled up in her eyes and she squeezed them shut, burying her head in his side. All she wanted was for him to be better. She couldn't lose him again. She wished he had never opened that can; wished she had never asked him to. This was her fault. If she had listened to him, this would have never happened. And now he was paying for her mistake.

The Doctor let out a strangled cry. Rose sat up immediately and leaned over him, pushing her hair out of her face as she did. Pain was written across the Doctor's face and his body writhed. He screamed and it echoed through the room.

"Doctor! Doctor, wake up!" Rose cried putting a hand on his shoulder. He wailed again and shook her off. His eyes opened, but his pupils were dilated and he looked straight in front of him almost as if through Rose. His body convulsed and his head smacked against the back bed board.

"Doctor!" Rose screamed across his wails as he fell back. His body shutters turned into small trembles as his strength left him. Rose brought a hand up and stroked his face. He flinched at her touch.

"No… please, no," he mumbled as his face contorted with pain.

"It's alright," Rose murmured, but pulled her hand away. "I'm here."

"No…"

The Doctor heaved a broken gasp and went still. Rose watched him, feeling tears snake down her cheeks. The Doctor's breathing steadied once more as he drifted out of consciousness. Settling down on the bed, Rose kept away from him this time. She didn't want to wake him again. Every time he woke was with screams. She didn't want him to be in any more pain…

Rose closed her eyes, and quietly cried herself to sleep.


	8. The Doctor Forever

The Doctor opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling above him. The morning light shown through the window, draping over the bedspread in a golden glow. He wondered what time it was. Lazily he turned on his side, grunting as tiny pricks of pain shot up his back. Man, he was stiff. Reaching a hand out, he sought for the warmth of Rose beside him. He blinked as his hand grasped cold sheets.

"Rose?" he called out sitting up slightly. His gaze moved about the bedroom but he didn't see any sign of Rose. Panic started to rise up in his chest. Where could she be? He always got up before her. Had something happened?

Throwing the bedcovers off, he hopped out of bed. Spots swam before his eyes as he stood up too quickly. He brought a hand to his head and groaned. The Doctor swayed where he stood and his knees crumpled. Letting out a yelp in surprise he fell back against the mattress.

The door to the bedroom opened and he turned his head to see Rose run in. His face lit up when he saw her. _Rose! _ She went over to him with concern covering her face.

"Doctor, are you alright?" she asked leaning over him. He stared up at her. She looked so sad. Her mascara was messed up and he could see tears stained on her cheeks. She had been crying. Why…?

It hit him like a cold blast of icy wind. The alien can. The geheugen infecting his mind. Losing his memories. Forgetting who he was. The _Malus Lupus_ psychiatric ward. Rose staying with him. Inflicting his pain upon her. The mirror. The pain. Drifting in and out of consciousness. Hitting his head against the bed board. He remembered it all.

"Doctor?" Rose whispered. She reached out her hand, but then brought it back. The Doctor opened and closed his mouth, trying to form words. There was so much he had to say, yet couldn't seem to get it out.

"Rose, I…" he stammered below a whisper. She leaned down toward him, pulling her hair back and turning her ear to him in order to hear him better. Rose couldn't understand a word he was saying. Her heart hurt for him as he struggled to speak.

"Allons-y, Rose Tyler," he whispered in her ear. Rose's eyes widened and she pulled back and looked down at him. He smiled up at her. His brown eyes were soft and ancient as they gazed at her with something sparkling behind those eyes.

"Doctor?" Rose murmured feeling hope spark in her chest.

"Hello," he grinned, pushing himself up from the bed a bit.

"Doctor!" Rose cried happily and tackled him. Her arms around his neck, they fell back against the bed. He embraced her tightly, pulling her against him in a fit of giggles as he struggled to sit them up once more.

"You, you remember everything?" Rose pulled back to look at him. She moved so that she was sitting beside him on the bed. "You're still you?"

"Everything," the Doctor smiled. "TARDIS, Time Lords, space, past, present, future, previous regenerations, the first time I met you, Bad Wolf, Torchwood, the Medusa Cascade, daleks, cybermen, monsters, trying the domestic approach; I remember it all. I'm still me."

A tear fell down Rose's cheek as she smiled at him. He reached a hand up and wiped it away, caressing her face. She laughed slightly.

"I've missed you," she said.

"I've missed you too," he pulled her to him once more, pressing his forehead against hers.

"I thought… I thought you wouldn't remember—"

"How could I forget you, Rose?" he whispered, his breath ghosting over her lips. "And what with my superior Time Lord brain, I can remember everything else—which is quite a lot. But I'll never forget you. No bloody parasite is going to take that away from me."

"But it almost killed you," Rose turned her head away. "It was all my fault. I, I hurt you, told you to open that stupid can."

"Rose."

"None of this would have happened," her voice cracked. "I'm sorry. It was all my fault."

"_Rose,_" the Doctor said more firmly. He tilted her head up towards him gently with his thumb and index finger on her chin, so that he could look straightly at her.

"This was not your fault," he told her. "Don't ever blame yourself for what happened. I unleashed the geheugen on my own accord. I cursed myself. You got that? This would never be your fault. You can only take credit for making me better, which is what you do best."

Rose blinked away her tears as she stared at him. He caressed her cheek once more and leaned forward so that he pressed his lips against her forehead.

"Rose Tyler," he murmured. "I love you more than anything. And I will always love you."

He threaded his fingers in her hair and kissed her softly against her lips. Rose wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down closer to her. He gave her the most tender and loving kisses, pouring his heart out to her. He wrapped his free arm tight around her back, his fingers splayed against her side. Rose brought a hand to the back of his neck and rubbed the tiny hairs there. He reacted by squeezing her tighter—if possible—and moving his other hand to her cheek as he worked his lips against her with fervor.

Eventually the need to breathe broke them apart. He still held her close to him, and pressed his forehead against hers.

"I love you too," Rose whispered. The Doctor smiled and started giving her soft kisses against her face. Rose giggled as he made his way across her cheek and then nuzzled his nose with hers.

The sound of the front door opening met their ears and soon a voice called out, "Rose? Tony and I are just coming to check on you. Rose? Where are you?"

It was Jackie who was speaking. Rose had turned to look out the bedroom's door when her mother and brother had entered. Now she glanced back at the Doctor and called out, "Be there in a minute, mum. Let me get something first."

She stood up from the bed and took both the Doctor's hands in hers pulling him up with her. He swayed a little when he stood and Rose linked her arm in his for support. He murmured a quick 'thanks' to her with a grin and leaned against her shoulder. When the exited the bedroom they were met with a loud exclamation from Jackie.

"Oh my God! Doctor! You're, you're up!" she gasped running over to them. "Are you all better? Do you remember now? Do you know who I am? Is your head still hurting? Rose, is he all better? Is he? You know you're the Doctor? You're alright? Do you—?"

"I'm fine, Jackie. Better than ever," the Doctor cut her off with a smile. "Though, I might be going a little deaf now what with all you're talking."

"Never changes, does he?" Jackie huffed. "Oh, come here you!"

Mrs. Tyler ran over to him a seized him in a tight hug. Rose giggled as he stiffened up and looked down at the woman squeezing his chest.

"We're all so glad to have you back!" Jackie grabbed his head and kissed him roughly. The Doctor squeaked indignantly and pulled a disgusted face. Rose laughed and Jackie went over to embrace her as well. Once Jackie's back had turned on him, the Doctor wiped his mouth thoroughly with the back of his hand, earning a giggle from Tony Tyler as he hung back beside the couch.

"Tony!" the Doctor said happily when he saw the boy. "How's my favorite guy? Come here!"

The Doctor bent down to Tony's level and outstretched his arms. The five-year-old giggled and ran over to him hugging his neck with his small arms. He squealed with delight when the Doctor stood up pulling Tony with him.

"Yay! Doctor's back!" Tony said as the Doctor held him. "See, mum?"

"Yes, dear," Jackie smiled.

"Does that mean Rose doesn't havta be sad anymore?"

The Doctor gently set Tony down and ruffled his hair, "That's right, Tony."

He then stood back up and went over to Rose, a heartfelt smile across his face. He wrapped his arms around her again and kissed her softly.

"Ew!" Tony said loudly.

"Oh, hush," Jackie went over to her son. "They snog as much as they want."

Rose and the Doctor broke apart with a laugh, turning back to look at the other Tylers. Jackie had covered the boy's mouth and he was trying to pull her hand away with a giggle.

"So, you're all better?" Jackie asked. "No more alien in your head?"

"As far as I can tell," the Doctor assured her. "I've only got my one alien brain now; my own."

"Well, just to be sure, we should bring you over to Torchwood and give you one of those high-tech scan thingys," Jackie said.

"That's probably a good idea," the Doctor nodded. "I would just sonic my head with my screwdriver, but I think I left that at Torchwood?"

He glanced as Rose with a raised brow. She smiled, "Yep."

"Blimey, now how is that possible?" Jackie looked the Doctor up and down. "You remember everything now, but just, what, a day ago? You were in a coma-thing and not remembering anything."

"Well, Time Lords do have superior brains compared to humans," the Doctor had a slight smirk at the corner of his mouth.

"Oh, come off it."

"And also, a recalibration of the cognitive process helps a lot," the Doctor sniffed rubbing the back of his neck. Jackie gave him a blank stare.

"Er, hitting my head on the bed board, hard," he clarified. He pulled a face and moved his hand to the back of his skull, rubbing his fingers over the bump there. Rose gave him a sympathetic smile and took his free hand with hers.

"Okay then," Jackie gave her head a shake. "Now, what are we doing? We should be driving to Torchwood right now! Everyone is going to be so happy to see you! Now come on! I'll get the car started. Rose, help Tony with his coat, and Doctor, change into something else. That shirt is dirty."

"Yes ma'am," the Doctor gave a little salute. Jackie nodded approvingly and then headed out the flat door. Hesitantly, Rose released the Doctor's hand. He frowned when she did and Rose leaned over and placed a kiss to his cheek, before going over to help Tony with his jacket.

As the Doctor went into the bedroom, Rose bent down to Tony's level and helped him pull on his large coat. It had been a present from the Doctor to him, and looked almost identical to the one the Doctor owned, except that Tony's had tiny blue stars running around the sleeve cuffs.

"Thanks, Rose!" the boy thanked her. "Here's your coat! Mum says 's cold out there, you'll need it!"

Tony had grabbed her indigo leather jacket from the couch back and now offered it to her, stretching his arms up as high as he could reach, a toothy grin on his face.

"That's very kind, Tony," Rose smiled and pulled the jacket on, zipping it up to her neckline. Then she went over to the small coat hanger by the door and pulled down a scarf, wrapping it about her neck.

"Do you think mum would say this is dressed enough?" she asked her brother.

"Yes!" he squeaked.

"Now, don't you two look all wonderful, dressed up for the cold," the Doctor's voice called out. Rose lifted her head and smiled as he walked into the room dressed in his blue suit. He had adorned his long brown coat as well (not his original, but another one he had delightedly found at a thrift store here). He had shaved as well, getting rid of his stubble-grunge look. Smiling at her from across the room, he was looking exactly like his normal self. The Doctor, with his devilish grin and godly hair, handsome features with maroon trainers and a laugh in his eyes.

"A sight for sore eyes?" the Doctor asked spreading his arms. Rose laughed and ran over to him embracing his stiff frame. He wobbled a bit where he stood but wrapped his arms around her.

"Still a little off-balance, though," he grinned.

"I don't care," Rose said and kissed him. He smiled against her mouth and pulled her closer. Tony cleared his throat loudly and when they parted Rose glanced back at him and saw him with crossed arms and a raised brow, looking absolutely adorable. He had every inch of his mother's sass, even at his young age.

"Oh, sorry, Tony," the Doctor gave him a cocky grin. "Were we disgusting you?"

Tony nodded and stuck his tongue out. Rose laughed and grabbing the Doctor's hand, started leading him to the door. Tony had already started walking in that direction and Rose called out a little "careful" and "mum will kill me if you get hurt". They exited the flat shortly, all clambering into Jackie's large BMW (a "just because" present from Pete) with a "what took you all so long?" from Jackie.

Upon entering the Torchwood headquarters, the Doctor was met with loud exclamations of happiness. The entire team ran over seized Rose and him in a huge group hug. Laughter was everywhere and there were much rejoicing. Tears of joy were shed—mostly from Ianto, even though he denied it. Pete brought out a bottle of champagne to celebrate the Doctor's return to health, which everyone (except Tony) shared. Jackie probably had more than she should, but no one dared to try and take her glass away.

"Now everything's gone, right?" Jake asked the Doctor from where he sat on top of one of the lab tables beside Tosh. "No more bloody parasite?"

"I think so," the Doctor said. He was sitting on the sofa with Rose, his arm around her shoulders on the seat back. "But a quick scan wouldn't be bad to do."

"Right," Gwen spoke. "We want to make sure you're all cured."

"Yeah," Tosh agreed. "Torchwood would never work without you, and Rose. You're the best thing that ever happened to this place."

"Agreed," Owen nodded and raised his glass to the Doctor. "Here's to the last of the Time Lords, the greatest alien there ever was!"

"Ay!" Everyone shouted in unison.

The Doctor smiled, "Good to know I have such a nice fan club. And don't forget to give yourselves credit, you guys are the greatest…team? No, crew? Gang; I like that. You guys are the greatest gang I've ever had."

"Thanks boss," Jake grinned. "I'll go set the scanner up if you want."

"That be great, Jake," Rose said.

"Oh! Can I help?" Tony sprang up from where he was sitting on his father's lap. "Can I help, Jake? Please, please, please? I want to help the Doctor!"

"Sure you can, mate," Jake laughed and ruffled the boy's hair. "Come on, I'll show you how to work the shiny machine."

Tony's eyes lit up and he bounced up and down happily. The Doctor chuckled softly as he watched the giddy boy. The kid reminded him of himself some time, when he was that young, yearning for adventure and the unexpected.

"Now, you be careful," Jackie called. "If he hurts himself, Jake, I'm gonna—"

"Jackie," Pete cut her off. Jake and Pete disappeared down a hallway. The Doctor watched them go, feeling a wave of tiredness pass over him. His shook his head and blinked his eyes a few times, trying to wake himself up more.

"So, Doctor," Ianto spoke. "What was that parasite anyway?"

The Doctor removed his arm from around Rose and sat forward, resting his elbows on his knees and explained, "It's called a geheugen. They're tiny microscopic creatures invisible to the human eye and most Earth microscopes."

"But not Torchwood scanners," Owen said proudly.

"Yes," the Doctor nodded.

"But what do they do exactly?" Tosh asked. "Besides eat your memories, I mean."

"Well, that's basically what they do," the Doctor said. "The geheugen feed on thoughts and brain waves. They latch themselves onto the host's brain cells and, well, basically trap them. Once they've caught enough to feed the every organism in their pack—they always travel in groups of millions—they'll come together and basically destroy the cells, killing the host.

"Many races used to use the geheugen to win their battles by unleashing them into the air. They're aerosol—invisible, mind you. That can that we found? It was, well, a grenade, you could say."

"So, at one time, some alien tried to destroy the human race with those creatures?" Gwen asked.

"Wouldn't be the first time, now would it?" the Doctor said.

"But that must have been ages ago," Rose said. "How long can the geheugen live?"

"Centuries," the Doctor sighed. "However, geheugen can be destroyed very quickly once found out. Around the year, oh, what was it? Twenty-five thousand? Yeah, I think so. Well, around that time, the Shadow Proclamation found a 'cure' that would kill the organisms and, well, basically committed genocide on the species, wiping them from the universe."

"Not here, it seems," Rose said.

"Oh, I think they did," the Doctor told her. "They just missed a few. Nobody's perfect. The geheugen are like the daleks. There always seems to be one bloody one left in the universe."

"Well all the geheugen here are gone at least," Pete said. "That can got destroyed when we scanned the traces left over from the creature, and you don't have any more left in you."

"Oh yeah," the Doctor nodded. "All clear here. Well, we'll know after I give myself a scan down. But I doubt there's any of the parasites left."

"Good," Rose said softly. The Doctor turned to look at her. She was staring at her hands in her lap and her face downcast slightly. He knew that she must be remembering the events that had partaken in the days past.

He reached his hand out and gingerly took one of hers. She looked up and him and smiled faintly. Leaning forward, he kissed her tenderly against her cheek.

"Aw," Owen said causing the Doctor and Rose to glance at him. The man had a goofy grin on his face and turned to Tosh and Gwen, "Now how come I can't get any of that from either of you two?"

"Because you suck," Gwen stated plainly.

"Oh! You cut me deep, dear Gwen!" Owen mocked a hurt expression placing a hand over his heart. Gwen rolled her eyes and the Doctor and Rose snickered.

"Oi, Doctor," Jake walked into the room with Tony trundling after him. "I've got the scanner set and ready."

"Right," the Doctor stood up from the couch. Rose got up with him and together they followed Jake into the one of the lab rooms. Tony could be heard as they left telling Jackie and Pete about the new machine he saw.

The scanner reminded the Doctor a lot of the scanner he had almost frozen in on the spaceship he and Martha had gotten stranded on before, falling into a living sun. Although that had been a stasis chamber and this was just a scanner. Like a MRI scanner, just more powerful.

The Doctor laid himself down at the retractable slab, resting his arms beside him. Tosh had joined Jake and the two set the controls for the machine and checked to see if he was positioned right on the slab before wheeling him in.

The scan took a few minutes, and the Doctor used the time to rest. His whole body was exhausted and his mind tired. The scratches on his body from the mirror were healing well, but they still ached when he moved.

The scanner beeped signaling the process was complete. Jake pulled the slab out of the scanner's tunnel and the Doctor sat up, rubbing his tire eyes. Rose came over to him with a wide smile across her face making the Doctor grin. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed him hard.

"You're A-okay, Doctor," Tosh stated. "No more geheugens."

"Brilliant!"the Doctor grinned and hopped off the slab. "You all are brilliant. Brilliant Torchwood! Now, just stand there, Tosh… 'cause I'm gonna hug you."

Before Tosh could react the Time Lord scooped her up in a big hug. Rose and Jake laughed as Tosh squeaked in surprise. The Doctor set her down with a grin and then turned to Jake.

"You're next," he smiled.

"What? Oh, no, that's not necessary—" Jake backed away but the Doctor wouldn't hear it. He gave the man the same hug, commenting on how amazing they all were. He didn't stop there. Once they went back into the main room, he proceeded to hug everyone present, giving an especially large hug to Rose.


	9. Better With Two

**A/N**: Last chapter! Thank you so much for all the comments! I hope you enjoyed this fic!

* * *

The Doctor leaned against Rose's shoulder as they climbed the stairs to their flat. He was utterly spent. After talking with Torchwood for many hours, Jackie made the call that it was getting late and that they should be heading out. They exchanged goodbyes, and the Doctor promised he'd come back the next day to see how the growing TARDIS was doing. Pete had said there was no need, and the ship was doing fine; but all the same, the Doctor had insisted he would.

Then he, Pete, Jackie, Tony, and Rose had gone out and had a very lovely supper with turkey, chips, and bananas, lots of bananas. The Doctor hadn't realized how famished he was and scarfed down almost three servings.

Jackie had driven the Doctor and Rose back to their flat afterwards. The Doctor could feel his body growing increasingly tired and had trouble standing up straight as Jackie hugged him goodbye.

Rose opened the door to the flat and he shuffled in, his eyelids drooping. He shrugged off his coat and it fell to the floor. That wasn't its proper place. Grunting, he bent down and retrieved it from the ground.

"Here, I'll get that," Rose took his coat from him and started to push him in the direction of the bedroom. "You're exhausted. Get to bed."

"But, but," he mumbled. "I want to stay with you."

"I'll be there in a minute," Rose gave him a smile.

He made short work of changing into some jimjams and preparing for bed. Then he collapsed willing upon the bed, lying on his back and pulling the duvet over him. His eyes drifted closed and he rested, feeling his body relax.

Rose went in the bedroom quietly. A soft smile played on her lips as she saw the Time Lord stretched out on the bed. All signs of pain were gone from his face, as if nothing had ever happened to him.

As softly she could, Rose crept across the room and into the connected bathroom. She dressed and brushed her teeth quickly and went over to the bed. Turning off the bedside light, the room was plunged into darkness. Rose crawled under the covers on her side. Her gaze traveled over the Doctor, watching the soft rise and fall of his chest before she closed her eyes.

oo000oo

Something wasn't right. Opening his eyes the Doctor let them adjust to the darkness of the room. Then he looked about him trying to pinpoint Rose. His eyes fell upon her to his left and he frowned. She wasn't facing him but lying a few feet away with her back turned to him.

"Rose?" he called out. He tried to move over to her, but his back protested when he tried to budge, with sharp little pains pricking up his spine. Annoyed he gave up his futile attempts and laid his head back on the pillow.

"Rose," the Doctor raised his voice a bit. "_Rose."_

"Hm? What?" she stirred beside him. "Doctor? Are you alright? Is something wrong?"

"Yes."

"What happened?" her voice had panic in it and she sat up on the bed. "Did you have an attack? Does your head hurt?"

"No," he blinked. "Not really."

"Are you too cold? Or too hot?"

"No."

"Then," she frowned. "Then, what's wrong?"

"You're too far away."

He tilted his head to look over to her. She had a surprised look on her face that soon turned into a soft smile. As she moved closer to him, the Doctor lifted his arm so he could wrap it around her shoulders. She buried her head in the crook of his neck and draped her arm across his chest, snuggling into his side. The Doctor rested his cheek against her forehead with a smile.

"Better?" Rose murmured.

"Mmhmm," the Doctor turned his head so that he could kiss her temple. He brought his arm up and laid his hand over hers, while he rubbed her shoulders lightly with his other arm.

"Hmm," Rose hummed as he cuddled her. "Love you."

"I love you too, Rose Tyler," the Doctor whispered into her hair. Soon Rose's breathing steadied as she drifted back to sleep. Holding her in his arms, he listened to the sound of her heart beating in tune to his own. Two hearts. She made him the Time Lord he was; she made him better.

Slowly the Doctor's eyes closed and he joined Rose in a much needed slumber.


End file.
